It's been a week since my last post, and three weeks since Duane Frierson bravely made his way into the heart of turkey controlled territory. There continues to be a lull in the attacks, and the only turkey related fatality during this time occured when Rand Harris choked to death on a hunk of lukewarm breast meat. He never would listen to his wife Soyabelle, preferring to gum his food rather than go to the trouble of finding his teeth.
I have decided to send a search party out into the forbidden zone so that the whereabouts and condition of Mr. Frierson might be known. Several of the towns sturdiest men have volunteered for the mission, which will likely lead them to their deaths. Storch McNamara, who owns a profitable lard farm and bucketing facility, has stepped up along with his two eldest boys Ring and Turt McNamara. Breech Piltner, longtime Belvidere hair vendor, and Brim Pinkerton, town astrologer, has joined the team as well. They will be leaving today. We wish them godspeed. Bring back our Duane boys!